You knew David Barkman in this community by watching his journey on the path of life he chose, his heart and empathy for others and from those he loved and those who admired and loved him back, because of who David Barkman was in life.
He counted every day as a gift from his Lord and savior.
No need for an obituary to tell us about David Barkman. David Barkman wrote his own obituary by how David Barkman lived.
“Let us remember him not with sorrow,” grandson Christian Barkman remembered during last Saturday’s celebration and farewell at Haymount United Methodist Church, “but with gratitude for the countless lives he touched.”
Not just the lives of humankind, mind you, but the lives of the animals that Dr. David Barkman treated for 48 years at Highland Animal Hospital along with fellow veterinarian Berry Bostic. Close your eyes, and you can see David Barkman cradling a struggling animal securely in his arms with a look of assurance that the animal would have days to come to romp and roam in the backyard of the neighborhood kids.
He was the dog whisperer with a compassion for our four-legged creatures and the pet owners who loved them, with a whisper for the felines, too.
He cared.
“He was not just an amazing veterinarian,” a grandson studying to become a veterinarian said in remembrance. “He was a compassionate healer, who dedicated his life to the well-being of animals.”
And David Barkman, a daughter would tell us, loved deeply.
“He loved with every fiber in his being, and if you know Dave, you know he wasn't afraid to tell you how much he loved you, how proud he was of the person you'd become, how proud he was of the family you’d raised and how much he appreciated you,” Dr. Mandy Middleton, a Fayetteville dentist, said of her father. “He never left anything unspoken or unfelt. He would encourage you to tell others how much you love them.”
‘The best veterinarian that he could be’
David and Karen Barkman came to Fayetteville in 1976, where David Barkman would join with the late Dr. Charles Speegle and Dr. Berry Bostic at Highland Animal Hospital, founded circa 1956. Bostic said the young veterinarian was hoping to return to his native Indiana, where David Barkman earned his undergraduate and veterinary degree from Purdue University.
The call for a veterinarian was scarce in Barkman’s native Indiana, Bostic said, and Dr. Speegle was nearing the end of his veterinary career.
“I thought that the practice was too busy for one and that I was going to need help,” Dr. Bostic said.
He remembered a young David Barkman with a caring way for animals.
“He wanted to be the best veterinarian that he could be,” said Dr. Bostic, who joined with Dr. Barkman in buying the practice after Dr. Speegle retired. “We enjoyed each other and we liked each other. We had a lot in common. He was very fair with the owners of the pet. He always strived to just do his best to get that animal back healthy again. We both did, and that’s why we were successful.”
Lisa Jonas was employed at the animal hospital before becoming a veterinarian at Cape Fear Animal Hospital.
“He was always good spirited and always ready to teach me,” she said. “He had an unwavering compassion for animals.”
Berry Bostic and David Barkman became more than veterinary partners. They became the best of friends.
“I invited him to come to Haymount United Methodist,” Dr. Bostic, 76, said. “We both became very involved in the church.”
David Barkman joined the church choir. He taught Sunday school. He went on countless church missionary trips from Macedonia to Armenia to Ethiopia to Fiji to Vietnam.
“My grandpa loved to serve like it was his life mission,” granddaughter Allison Middleton said. “He loved to help anybody who demonstrated a need. He would gladly donate time to build a wheelchair ramp or to stop what he was doing to change a tire. He and my Nana would donate money for any mission project they felt called to support, both to local charities and to those with global impact.”
Others before himself
No reach was too far for David Barkman, whether helping build a Habitat for Humanity home, volunteering his time at the Fuller Center or serving up eggs and bacon at Fayetteville Area Operation Inasmuch for the homeless and hungry.
“He was Dave,” the Rev. Allen Bingham said. “He didn't put on any kind of airs. He just showed up.”
David Barkman was tall and strong and handsome. He was athletic and physically fit. He was good to look upon. He embraced people and animals. David Barkman embraced his wife of 53 years and his family. He embraced life.
“We never wanted Grandpa to be alone, and all took turns staying with him at the hospital,” granddaughter Mary Reese Barkman said about David Barkman’s fight to recover from a stroke he experienced Dec. 13 while walking in his Haymount neighborhood. “During my stay, I was very lucky to overhear him tell a nurse about each and every one of his grandkids. He went down the line telling about each grandkids’ sports achievements, hobbies, how old they were and what was going on in their lives. At the end of the conversation, when the nurse asked what he needed, he asked for her to put his blanket on me and told her that I was always cold, so he wanted me to have it instead.”
That was David Barkman, always putting others before himself.
Dr. David Lyle Barkman died Jan. 16.
He was 76.
“My brother, Seth, said that he believes Dad was able to love life and people so openly, because he felt incredibly blessed and lived each day with gratitude. He was fortunate, because even on his worst day, he would have told you he was a blessed man.”
That was David Barkman, a Christian soldier of steadfast faith in his God.
A son’s remembrance
The Haymount United Methodist Church sanctuary was filled from front to back Saturday in every pew with those from this community who braved the cold and blustery winds to pay their final respects.
“My Mom and my Dad have surrounded themselves with beautiful people in this town of Fayetteville, and it shows,” said Dr. Josh Barkman, 48, who along with his brother, Japheth, followed in their father’s footsteps as veterinarians at Highland Animal Hospital. “Look around. The group gathered here today, and those who couldn’t be, exemplify my Dad and my Mom, and all directly responsible for how well our family has done … and for their relationships in this room. And, so I, and we, owe a deep debt of gratitude in Fayetteville and in large to the warm welcome they received moving here in 1977 to Fayetteville and have been here ever since. And it’s due to the influence of all of you in this room.”
He would leave us with a lasting lesson from his father, and a lesson that has been with him daily.
“He gave me a lot of advice and I've gotten a lot of advice from a lot of good people, but it was the best fatherly advice and the most practical fatherly advice he ever gave me,” Josh Barkman said.
“I was 13, and we were waiting to turn left on the Skibo Road off of Raeford Road, and I don’t know what prompted it.
“He looked at me and said, ‘You will realize as life goes by that there are things that you see in me that you want to emulate,” Josh Barkman said. “‘There are things that you will like about what I do in life and how I share myself and how I behave.’ And, he said, ‘Those will be very easy things for you to copy,’ And, he said, ‘And you will see things that you do not like that are not the direction you want to go that are far less than perfect and good direction that you just don't want ahead.’ And, he said, ‘That’s going to be the hard part, that's going to be the challenge.’ And, he said, ‘Those things I want you to fight really hard not to be like me.’”
Josh Barkman says he never has forgotten his father’s words.
Epilogue
He was David Barkman.
No need for an obituary.
David Barkman’s life story was written in how David Barkman lived his life for all of his days.
He was a good man, and all who knew him will tell you so.
“The Lord gave Dave to us,” the preacher said. “Now, we give him back.”
Bill Kirby Jr. can be reached at billkirby49@gmail.com or 910-624-1961.
